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Midnite Martini’s Colorado Burlesque Festival Diary

Midnite Martini’s Colorado Burlesque Festival Diary

Midnite Martini's Colorado Burlesque Festival Diary

I’m honoured to be a co-producer of the Colorado Burlesque Festival. I just finished up our 3rd year with fellow 2012 co-producers Lola Spitfire, Honey Touche, Bunny Bee, Ruby Sparkle, and Naughty Pierre. Many thanks to everyone involved, from staff to performers to volunteers and audience members. This was the largest CBF yet and do we have the memories to prove it!

THURSDAY, July 12th

It’s the first day of the big festival and with five suitcases and two tote bags I check into the Sheraton Hotel, CBF’s official hotel this year. Tonight is our Opening Gala at the Summit Music Hall, with emcee Cora Vette! This is just the beginning folks and here are some of the day’s highlights:

– All of the producers (minus Pierre) and some of the Peaks & Pasties troupe all dressed in skin tight leopard suits and pink wigs. I don’t think the sound guy could take me very seriously during tech but we certainly got business done and turned a few heads!

"All of the producers (minus PIerre) and some of Peaks & Pasties troupe all dressed in skin tight leopard suits and pink wigs."   ©Midnite Martini
“All of the producers (minus PIerre) and some of Peaks & Pasties troupe all dressed in skin tight leopard suits and pink wigs.” ©Midnite Martini

– Our headliners all arrived in town. In Denver welcome fashion I spilled tequila all over Nadine Dubois while ‘forcing’ the headliners to all take shots. But luckily Sammich the Tramp was there to drink it back up!

– What a terrific show to open up the festival!  To see full album of show pics visit this link . Images by Sharp Edge Photography.

"In Denver welcome fashion I spilled tequila all over Nadine Dubois while "forcing" the headliners to all take shots. But luckily Sammich the Tramp was there to drink it back up!"  ©Midnite Martini
“In Denver welcome fashion I spilled tequila all over Nadine Dubois while “forcing” the headliners to all take shots. But luckily Sammich the Tramp was there to drink it back up!” ©Midnite Martini

– Our closing act of Perle Noire and Cora Vette doing a live version of ‘Lick It!’ If you can’t imagine it, let me just say that standing next to our videographer (who sees burlesque shows three times a week and was volunteering his time to video CBF – thank you Paul) I thanked him for his time and asked him if we could repay him in any way. He replied that if she (referring to Perle) was going to be in all of the shows that was plenty payment enough!

"During curtain call Perle received a giant pie in the ass, compliments of Sammich and Lola VanElla."  ©Sharp Edge Photography
“During curtain call Perle received a giant pie in the ass, compliments of Sammich and Lola VanElla.” ©Sharp Edge Photography

It was Perle Noire’s birthday, so what better way to celebrate than topping that hot booty with some dessert! During curtain call, Perle received a giant pie in the ass, compliments of Sammich and Lola Van Ella. Except it wasn’t dessert at all, it was shaving cream – an unfortunate thing for Lola Spitfire to find out after she licked the white foam right off Perle’s backside.

"Perle laid down in meek fashion until Gentleman King and Mistress Victoria DeVille wiped her clean."  ©Midnite Martini
“Perle laid down in meek fashion until Gentleman King and Mistress Victoria DeVille wiped her clean.” ©Midnite Martini

Well you know shy little Perle; she was so embarrassed she was just paralysed and couldn’t get that naked creamed body off the stage. She laid down in meek fashion until Gentleman King and Mistress Victoria DeVille wiped her clean.

FRIDAY, July 13th

Today we have classes from some of the fabulous performers that travelled here for the festival. Tonight we have two shows down at Lannie’s Clocktower Cabaret, emceed by one of amazing our headliners, Nadine Dubois! Here are some of the highlights:

We had two SOLD OUT shows, packed to the brim to see all the fabulousness! The energy was incredible again, with amazing performances all night long!  To see full albums of show pics go here. Images by Trout Imagery.

The Friday dance party.  ©Broken Glass Photography
The Friday dance party. ©Broken Glass Photography

Some audience members (apparently new to burlesque) went to management several times throughout the show to complain about loud, lewd, raucous behaviour from a table next to them. That table was where the CBF producers and headliners were sitting all night. We got in trouble at our own festival, but were able to laugh at it afterwards when the table just decided to leave early instead.

Back at the hotel there was a dance party for all the CBF guests and performers who weren’t at the show. All the crazy burlesquers getting down in the conference room of the Sheraton – what?!

The Friday Night after party.  ©Broken Glass Photography
The Friday Night after party. ©Broken Glass Photography

At 2am, the party moved from the conference rooms to the hotel rooms… and you can use your imagination from there.

SATURDAY, July 14th

Today, classes by our headliners are helping to teach the Colorado masses. And tonight it’s the final big show at the gorgeous Paramount Theatre, with our emcee Naughty Pierre! It’s balls to the walls or nothing today and here are the highlights:

– Electric energy from the crowd and stunning performances from all. See a full album of show pics here and here.

Perle Noire's boobie birthday cake.  ©Broken Glass Photography
Perle Noire’s boobie birthday cake. ©Broken Glass Photography

– In the CBF producer’s number, Lola Spitfire broke out some badass hip hop moves to all of our surprise! Who knew that bitch could breakdance battle?!

– We brought out a boobie cake for Perle Noire‘s birthday (hey, you can celebrate your birthday for a weekend, right?). She took a big bite out of the side and then set it on the floor pretending like she was going to sit on it. But before Perle had the chance to fake us out, Roxi D’lite, like a flash of naked glory, tackled Perle right into the birthday cake!

The cake tackle!   ©Broken Glass Photography
The cake tackle! ©Broken Glass Photography

Everyone then proceeded to smear cake all over the two naked headliners as they rolled and hugged on the ground. Yes people, this actually happened!

SUNDAY, July 15th

For the 3rd year in a row we all watched the sun come up on Sunday morning of CBF! The last and most hungover day of the festival has arrived and here are the highlights:

– On about two hours of sleep and very grateful for late check out we rolled ourselves down to the burlesque bazaar, where our fabulous vendors were selling all sorts of sparkly things!

– Pool Party Action! There, co-producer Ruby Sparkle was representing in the pool – I have to think still drunk from the night before – and rocking out a pink tutu.

Co-producer Ruby Sparkle representing in the pool...  ©Midnite Martini
Co-producer Ruby Sparkle representing in the pool… ©Midnite Martini

And as the sky turned twilight and our late check time was nearing, we said heartfelt goodbyes to all the amazing performers, headliners, volunteers, friends and family! I’m exhausted, hungover, covered in glitter, have several scandalous pictures I’m plotting to delete from various cameras, smell of boob sweat and alcohol, have no voice left, and have drunk dial messages on my phone that I have not listened to yet.

All signs of yet another successful Colorado Burlesque Festival!

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